We only stayed in France for three months before returning to the Isle of Man. It’s been fifty years since I spent Christmas on the island so it seemed like a good idea to repeat the exercise and see what I’d been missing!

First of all, though, there was some other business to attend to! in early December we enjoyed a really pleasant evening with Penny and Sarah, friends from the Isle of Man who were visiting Paris. We ate at “Le Procope” in Paris. Founded in 1686 and now Paris’ oldest café, there’s a great atmosphere. The food is excellent and reasonably priced (for central Paris). I tried a Tête de Veau (veal’s head) which, for some reason, I’ve always avoided till now. Frankly, I shall carry on avoiding it! There was nothing wrong with the food or the way it had been prepared it’s just that some foods suit us and some don’t. Tête de Veau turned out to just not be my thing. The other three hit luckier than me with dishes that suited them and that they enjoyed. But I had the pleasure of the company of three charming ladies, so I’m not complaining! The evening was fun and it was great to meet friends in a different environment.

And talking of Penny and Sarah, we will have pleasure of their company on December 24th for our Christmas celebration. But more of that when it happens because first we celebrated an early Christmas with M-D’s family near Orléans in north-central France. As our childrens’ families mature, we see less of them than before and, to me, this is quite right. They have built their own lives and we are now only a small part of it. So, since Muriel, Vincent and ‘the girls’ were heading to Corsica for Christmas, we spent an evening with them and had an early festive celebration.

And then came the time to head back to Britain. First, I had to pack the car! Normally, when we drive back from France, the enormous heap of stuff in the garage manages to fit into the limited space available for it in a B Class Mercedes. This time, however, The Tardis failed to expand through the super-galactic space–time continuum where matter becomes anti-matter and requires no extra space and, as a result, several dozen bottles of wine were left behind. However, I think we took the important stuff…
Chocolate Snails – CHECK
Various Liquours (a lot) – CHECK
Cheese Aperitif Cubes – CHECK
Armagnac – CHECK
Duck Breasts (several kilos) – CHECK
Bottles of Wine (enough to float a battleship) – CHECK
Foie Gras – CHECK
Other Alcoholic Stuff (a lot) – CHECK
Strange Frech Sausage Things – CHECK
Calvados – CHECK
Roll of Carpet – CHECK
More Wine – CHECK
Lovely Biscuity Things – CHECK
5 litre Boxes of Wine (enough to sink a submarine) – CHECK
Tasty Cakey Things – CHECK
3 litre Boxes of Wine (almost enough to sink a submarine) – CHECK
Chocolates (weighed by the metric tonne) – CHECK
A Bottle or Three of Wine – CHECK
Selection of excellent Pates and Stuff – CHECK
Some wine – CHECK
Passport, Tickets etc. – CHECK

Now, what did I forget?
A wife, did you say?
No – she was lying on her back in the garage seeing if she could dispose of the excess wine before we left. Apparently it’s an ancient French tradition, so I took her down a plate of snails at dinner time!

Our trip back wasn’t so good either! We left our home, west of Paris, in good heart and with a clear sky. The traffic was gentle and flowed at a steady 80 mph all the way to Calais (200 miles without even a queue of 2 cars). The pretty boat sailed the ocean blue, crossing to Dover in good time. Then it happened!

Landed at Dover at 13:30 – arrived in Crewe where my niece lives (300 miles later) at 19:45. That’s over 6 hours of nose-to-tail traffic jams, closed roads, roadworks, lousy weather and general British road congestion. And, of course, the boat to The Isle of Man was cancelled due to lack of interest and a little bit of rain and wind.

Why is driving in England getting worse and worse every time we pass through? Another few years and it’s going to just grind to a complete standstill.

Anyway, enough of that, you didn’t come here to listen to me muttering away! We finally got back to the island a day late, unloaded the car and got ready for Christmas.